Burritos. Tequila. Hoes.

I'm trying to figure out where I belong. Colin. Mid-Life Crisis.

September 11, 2014 11:55 am

asmilinggoddess:

this show is incredible

(via jesussbabymomma)

11:54 am 11:53 am
Aubrey Plaza - Photoshoot  Nylon Magazine

(Source: travelerg, via wheatthin)

11:46 am

blah-blahs:

This guy wants to be mad but can’t

(Source: ruinedchildhood, via jesussbabymomma)

11:44 am

j-e-d-i:

weelilyjean:

vvintersxldier:

mlikemarcel:

Scarlett Johansson, by Craig McDean for Vanity Fair

holy hell when did it become legal for someone to be this hot

Help me

She’s so fucking beautiful

Bae

(via lylamariemazie)

11:42 am 11:37 am

judgebunnie:

undereyelids:

Bruce Willis is probably going to keep making action movies because you know what they say about old habits

image

(via wheatthin)

September 3, 2014 2:22 pm

When white people go online and complain:

"Did a manager take it upon his or herself to greet our table? No. Did I flag one down? Absolutely. I’ve been a waitress/bartender/caterer in fine dining for 10 years, not to mention that I have been a mystery shopper for 4 different companies for the past 6 years. Perhaps that is why I am so incredibly detailed, and for that I apologize … sort of. Anyhow, at this point, I was very upset and trying hard not to be rude or unkind, but merely wanted to express my concerns and frustrations. He listened intently, asked about there whereabouts of our food over his earpiece, apologized, and said that it would be out shortly. My mom’s food Still had not come to the table. About 16 or 17 minutes After speaking with the manager, our food Finally came out. Mine looked and tasted fine (what a miracle!); hers looked pitiful … like it had been forgotten on the line, dried out, and then had soy sauce poured over it. Apparently, that’s exactly what it tasted like. She sighed. "I give up." She murmured, sadly. "Here, share mine. It actually tastes pretty good." Our server then came back over to ask how everything tasted. My mom pushed her plate forward slightly and quietly said, "I can’t eat this. This is terrible." He looked like he couldn’t believe that she had just said that, after all that we had been through already. I have a true sense of being able to tell when someone has "chalked a table up as a loss" and has basically given up on it, which is exactly what he had done. Our waters were nothing but the remnants of a few ice cubes in the glass. His tone, facial expressions, and body language said it all. He then frustratedly asked if she wanted something else, to which she quickly said, "No, I’m just nibbling off of hers," and she pointed to my plate. He said ok and asked if we still wanted dessert. I simply stated that we didn’t know yet because we finally just got some food on the table and he walked away. My mother then happened to overhear a cook call out for two meat-loafs (we were sitting right next to the semi-open-kitchen); I laughed at the irony. "You’ve got to be kidding me …" she mumbled. He then came Back and proceeded to ask if we wanted to order something else and take it To-Go so that we could still have the promotional price for our meal, that by taking her Asian Bistro off the ticket and ringing our appetizer and my meal up at regular price it would be $26 and some change vs $29.95 (WHAT?!?!?!) "No. No we do not want to wait another 45 minutes for food to take To-Go." He said ok and walked away again. I excused myself to the restroom and to find the manager that I had previously spoken with. I got his attention when walking back to my table from the restroom and this is what I said (not angrily, but there was certainly a tone of frustration in my voice), "Excuse me, Sir? Let me see if I understand this correctly … we are being asked to order another meal that could potentially be cooked incorrectly and/or take another 45 minutes to cook Just so that we may maintain the price of the $29.95 promotion?" His response was this: "Yes, Ma’am. We do not have a button to discount a promotion in our computers." I looked at him incredulously. "So you mean to tell me that given our experience today that there is nothing in that computer that you can do as a manager for our bill?" "Well, Ma’am, usually in situations like this we give out gift cards for you to bring back and use on your next visit, but I apologize that we are currently out of gift cards." (More incredulously staring back at him). "First of all, that is not what I just asked you and secondly, to speak quite frankly, I never want to step foot in this establishment ever again. This is absolutely ridiculous." And I walked away from him. I was absolutely furious beyond words. Had I been raised differently and lacked class, I would have given him a piece of my mind that would have poured from my mouth like hot lava! In all my years in this industry, after all the crappy experiences I’ve had on either end of the spectrum, this is the absolute WORST dining experience that I have ever had in my entire life. You’re going to serve me LATE food that I am ALLERGIC to and then ask me to PAY for it?!?! Why is this individual in management? Never in my life. I am just fuming thinking about it all over again. Now I realize that there are some people out there that might go into a restaurant seeking a free meal. My mother and I have both worked in the industry for more than our share of years and can assure, without a shadow of a doubt, that neither one of us would EVER, in a million years, stoop so low, much less would I take valuable time away from my studies to write such an extremely detailed complaint. Upon exiting the establishment, I gently touched the shoulder of the hostess that seated us and genuinely told her, "I just want you to know that you were the best part of our experience." I think that it is important that you are aware of exactly what is going on in your establishment. Horrible first impression. Horrible service. Horrible management. I honestly don’t know what else I can possibly say."

August 26, 2014 1:03 pm

yoncehaunted:

*SHOUTING TO THE HEAVENS*

(via wheatthin)

1:02 pm